Literary Lacquers - If It Pleases You

GOOD NEWS! The most gorgeous bruised purple holographic polish has emerged from the dungeon! It's called If It Pleases You and I have only been drooling over it for 10 bajillion years. It's from the Good Parts collection (literary erotica inspired!) and is influenced by the first real erotic literature I read that didn't have a picture of Fabio on the front. BACKSTORY! Anne Rice was one of my FAVORITE authors in high school and during my youthful and formative teen years, I went on vacation with my family. I have this bad habit of rummaging through the bookshelves of wherever I go, and I found a high and semi-hidden shelf. Of course, I promptly found the The Claiming of Sleeping Beauty. Which I then read. And was caught. Oops. Anyway, these are also the last pictures of my nails before I had to nubbinize them. And man, are they GORGEOUS. 

Ott-lamp lighting. Two coats. TWO COATS. My eyes, they are overwhelmed with RAAAAAAAAAINBOWS!

Digital Nails Pandorica

Sweet sweet completionism, dear readers! I have officially been able to (as of now) swatch and wear all of the holographic jelly polishes by Digital Nails. I just realized that it is one of my go-to indie brands - I will certainly make an effort to expand my horizons! I apologize for my intense fixation. Moving along, I was bestowed upon a mini of Pandorica - a deep deep charcoal grey almost black jelly polish that was so massively dosed with spectraflair that I suspect Digital Nails captured some spare stars to grind into the polish. I used two layers of Pandorica to achieve awesomeness and a later of a 50/50 Nubar Diamont/Essie Good to Go franken top coat mixture. I've never been so thrilled to live in a broiling hot place with no clouds. 

Party Girl Lacquer Man Candy

This was provided to me for the express purpose of a review. All of the opinions are my own and based on my experience with the product. 

Okay, I'd like to say I'm sorry for not being as regular as I should be about blog posts. I wish there was some sort of blogging fiber that would make my posts more regular. (ha ha, I'm funny). I'm totally making it up for you (and me) by showing off one of my untrieds - Essie Power Clutch and a brand new indie brand for me - Party Girl Lacquer Man Candy. It was calling to me. Anyway, there was an awesome polish meet up in my city and I was seriously lucky enough to attend. The maker for Party Girl Lacquer was there and I spazzed out over her polishes. She then provided me with a couple to review and after my small heart attack, I accepted and recovered long enough to review the polish. You can buy this polish (and others) at her Big Cartel. Also, follow her on Facebook and on Instagram!

Man Candy is a holographic glitter topper that consists of tiny iridescent glitters, tiny teal glitters (metallic and holographic), and midnight blue matte glitters of all sorts of varieties. I chose to put one coat over Essie Power Clutch - a medium grey. 

First off - look how terrifyingly white I am! Second - this is some pretty rad glitter coverage for one coat. I got all of the glitters I was hoping for, especially that smattering of medium hexes! The balance of this polish is awesome, it looks great as a topper and would probably gradient really well too! More pictures after the jump!

Digital Nails Purple Reign

And before the reader thinks that this is a polish based off of the Prince song, it's actually based off of a seriously awesome graphic novel and comic series - Saga. I mean, I assume it's awesome. Digital Nails has pretty great taste in books, so I have no reason to think it's NOT a good read. In fact, the last time I went to go get a new d20, I saw it and picked it up and contemplated paying FULL PRICE. Moving on now - Purple Reign is part of three different Saga influenced polishes. If you like Hook 'em Horns, Stars at Night, or Pandorica, then you'll probably like Purple Reign. It's a rich, deep grape purple that almost looks black at night and it's loaded with spectraflair - giving it a glamorous holographic kapow. 

Digital Nails The Stars at Night (are big and bright)

DEEP IN THE HEART OF TEXAS! Thanks, Digital Nails. I'll have that song stuck in my head all day now. Anyway, I have the opportunity to show off one of her gorgeous creations - Stars at Night. It's a phenomenal deep blue jelly holographic polish that is opaque in 2 to 3 coats and has formula like a boss. It was so tough to photograph because OF COURSE I wear it the one week in freaking July that it rains for days on end. Either way, I got one blip of sunlight to get some decent pictures. 

Mod Lacquer Dreamland and Technicolor Noise

Dear universe - quit being filled with chaos and stuff. It makes me tired and I do my nails less. Either way, I had the great opportunity to be part of a gifting chain (not an illegal one) where I received a metric ass ton of polish, including some GLORIOUS Mod Lacquer. Now - I have been lemming about a thousand million polishes of hers since my beginnings as an indie polish addict. Of course, I had to put as much on as I could at once. I chose to layer Technicolor Noise on top of Dreamland. Now, Dreamland is a glorious lavender cream with holographic sparklies of awesome. Technicolor Noise is a stupidly rad clear base packed with neon glitters of all shapes and sizes and magic. Anyway. Onward to pictures!

Here are my lovelies. 

This is two coats of Dreamland and just ONE of Technicolor Noise. The formula on both of these polishes were absolutely fantastic. My camera had some fun times trying to capture the full awesomeness of the neon glitters and the holographic effects. The poor thing. 

Gorgeous!

Natural lighting (everything else was under my trusty Ottlite)

UP CLOSE AND PERSONAL BABY!

Moving along now - I'm placing another Mod Lacquer order as I sit here. The full-sizes run $9.50 on her Etsy site. Of course, check them out on Facebook and Instagram for more swatches and updates. 

Lucky 13 Lacquer The Hero of Canton, the Man They Call Jayne

ALERT ALERT! My love of glitter toppers on strong linear holographic polishes marches on, all the way to Canton! Which brings me to one of the most awesome glitter toppers I own, and one with one of the longest names I have ever seen on a mini bottle: Lucky 13 Lacquer - The Hero of Canton, the Man They Call Jayne. This polish is a mix of various sizes of matte red, orange, and marigold hex glitters in a clear base - just like Jayne's epic hat that rocked the Firefly Geeksosphere.  I layered one layer of Hero of Canton over Color Club Cosmic Fate. Lucky 13 Lacquer is a 3-free and cruelty free (come on, her boss is her cat!) maker that rocks some great customer service -  she worked with me to get her entire Battle of Serenity collection..... and then some. Anyway - here are some pictures!

Bottle shot! The formula was pretty fantastic on this polish - you can either spread or dab it. I am totally a spreader. It was easy to manipulate and get even coverage on my baby nubbins and Madame Janky Pinkie. One coat gave some great glitter coverage. I was thinking about trying two, but I really wanted the holo to shine through. 

Here is an amazing close up shot. Look at all of those awesome little glitters! And that glitter payout! It makes me wonder how many coats to opacity. Unfortunately, cheapie cheap me bought a mini. I'm thinking this is an upgrade-r. 

I know I'm automatically biased because I love the show that Hero of Canton was based off of. If you like it and want to own it, check out Lucky 13 Lacquer on her website. Full sizes (15 mL) are $8.50 and shorties (10 mL) are $6. It is also highly recommended that you go like her on Facebook. Seriously, she's got a Harry Potter collection up too. 

What nerdiness would you want her to make next? 

Digital Nails Hook 'em Horns

Disclaimer: This polish was provided for me to review. All of the following opinions are mine and possibly completely ridiculous, including lots of !!!! These are completely my own.

Hello, fellow polish "collectors" and "hobbyists." Today has been probably one of the most awesome days EVER! I started my real-person-salary (very small) and I am wearing one of the most amazing polishes. What is this polish, you ask? Digital Nails Hook 'em Horns. Did I mention I went to the University of Texas for graduate school? Because I did. And all I got was a stinkin' sheet of paper. And a job. And finally - a nail polish. When Raphaelle informed me that she was making a burnt orange holo with the same copious amounts (similar to that of my former student loans) of Spectraflair, I promptly lost my brain and freaked out. Mainly because it didn't exist when I graduated. Hook 'em Horns is a polish that gives me the feels because I have a very uncertain relationship with the color orange, just like how I had one with UT when I didn't get in as an undergraduate. Well - SUCK IT BOTH OF YOU! Hook 'em Horns dominates the fear of the color orange on pale people and I dominated graduate school. BAM! I should probably use pictures instead of words. 

Yeah, yeah, I know. Phenomenal. It made my camera whimper in fear. Hook 'em Horns is a burnt orange jelly with stupidly irrational amounts of Spectraflair. Also, yes it is color accurate, a UT Snuggie was utilized in development and then I compared to a sweater of mine. It's a three (thin) coater for opacity but you can throw two coats over undies if you so desire. I'd have a recommendation, but I literally own two orange polishes and they would be undesirable as undies. The ridiculous shine you see comes from the Poshe top coat - only one coat necessary - Hook 'em Horns wasn't hungry at all. The formula on this was RAD. It was  pretty darn self-leveling with even coverage after two coats and super easy for me to control (and I was using a baby brush!). As always - Digital Nails satisfies and then makes me feel like a glutton for wanting more unbelievably gorgeous polish. 

I heard some of the best pictures of polish are taken in cars. I tested this theory. Look at DEM RAINBOWS.

Shade.

SUPER CLOSE

ANOTHER SUPER CLOSE.

Finally, I included a video. Really, even after all of these pictures - there is zero comparison to the gorgeosity of this polish in real life. 

There we have it. Once again, Digital Nails is an enlightening experience in color and craftsmanship. I have yet to be disappointed! Hook 'em Horns will be released in the Digital Nails restock this Friday (June 7th). It runs a reasonable $13. Buy this off her Etsy site. You also need to click that link and you should go like her on Facebook immediately. She'll be able to provide more updates for this lovely polish and other really awesome things.

Disclaimer: This polish was provided for me to review. All of the following opinions are mine and possibly completely ridiculous, including lots of !!!! These are completely my own.

Emerald And Ash Helix Nebula

Dear internet: I LOVE SPACE. I have loved space since I was a small child and I had a space themed birthday party when I was four years old. I even refused to allow people to wear alien deedly-bopper headband thingamajigs because I didn't think that aliens would have pom poms for antennas. I painted our solar system (when Pluto was a planet) and made a mobile in elementary school at some point. Yes, it was color accurate. TLDR: I LOVE SPACE. Which brings me to Emerald & Ash's Hubble-Inspired Collection. There is one named Deep Field, and another called Dark Matter. I ended up buying Helix Nebula. She doesn't state that it was inspired by a picture taken by the Hubble, BUT IT IS SPACE THEMED AND FOR THAT I LOVE IT. For reference, here is a link to Nasa's picture of the Helix Nebula. She put all of that in a 11 mL bottle of happiness. And, might I add, those bottle of happiness are cubical and adorable. PSA PEOPLE: I PAID FOR THIS BAD BOY. 

Helic Nebula is a black jelly jam-packed with blue and pink flecked shiny/shimmery bits that really are out to burst your retinas. It also is chock full of four different sizes of holographic hex glitters, methinks of the light gold/silver variety.

So - this is ONE coat (painted, not dabbed - although if I wore more than one coat I would recommend the dabbalicious method) of Helix Nebula on top of Illamasqua Baptiste **not my picture**. The reason I used undies is this: this is an 11 mL bottle and I tend to use heavy coats, as well as a new paranoia I have of running out of it, and because my new calling in life is to find perfect undies for everything. Ash mailed me Baptiste as a birthday present, as one of her favorite purples because it glows from within. I therefore decided it was worthy of being undies for her creation. Please, disregard the cat hair. She is fluffy and wanted love. Nothing I can do. Really. I am her pet. Also - I used Seche as a top coat and with the awful shrinkage that followed, regretted that decision.

SPACE ON MY NAILS. And that GLITTER PAY OFF! I really should have thrown another coat on there, simply because the depth would have melted my corneas into a pile of really happy goo. 

I had NO issue whatsoever with glitter payout or formula. I dabbed my pinkie and ring finger, and then painted my pointer and middle finger. Pretty great, regardless of application method. 

Also, I'd like to note that her glitter ratio was pretty rad and very space-y. I didn't have to fish for the larger hex glitters, and they just lept from the brush to my nail. I also had quite a few floating around on my fingers, but not too many either!

Holographic goodness.

Really, I should stop taking pictures now.

Eventually.

Rationale behind this picture: On the swatch wheel is three coats of Helix Nebula dabbed on. I wanted to compare it to my thumb for underwear comparison, glitter comparison, and so you all could see what three coats looked like. And yes, it took three coats for opacity. Hence - why I use panties. Also, for a fresh feeling. Other undies I'd want to try are OPI Ink and Nubar Indigo Illusion. And a Digital Nails I acquired that you and the universe have not seen yet. 

What do you need to know?! That Helix Nebula was a smooth rocket ship ride to my childhood and an excuse to browse pictures on the NASA website? That I am obviously not destined to be an astronaut because I couldn't paint my nails in zero gravity? Oh - Helix Nebula is available for $6.50 at the Emerald & Ash website! There is also an Etsy! Don't forget to like it on Facebook because of spoilers and stuff! Also - they are all 3 free, animal and cruelty free, yadda yadda yadda. 

And here is a collage. Why not, right?

Nubar Reclaim and Zoya Maya

Hello bloggiverse! I have an announcement: I AM RED AND PATCHY. This is very important. I was abducted by my family to go to the beach from Wednesday to this morning. It was very exciting - I have more pictures of birds and the cat in the rental condo place than people, and that's cool. Which  brings me to the polish(es) I will bring you tonight! Nubar Reclaim and Zoya Maya. Now, I do not have bottle shots today, mainly because I forgot Reclaim in the apartment and Maya I took pictures of in a super-classy hotel bedroom at 1 AM. I bought Reclaim when people were selling it on Amazon for $6.81 (WIN!) and I consider it a birthday present to myself! Maya is a super lovely gift. THANK YOU AMAZING GRAD SCHOOL FRIEND. Now - PICTURES! 

TWO COATS. TWO GLORIOUS EMERALD AMAZING COATS. Nubar Reclaim - you have my holographic heart. And I'm sure I even dulled it when I threw on a top coat too. It also doesn't have that chalky-holo look that linear holos sometimes end up with. 

Thank you for planting flowers, father. I have documented it - WITH MY NAILS.

In the shade. It's a perfect emerald green! I even love the color WITHOUT the rainbows.

I wanted to get a little bit closer.... and freakin' A is this pretty. I never wanted to take it off, but sand kind of told me I had to. 

Here we go. Stay tuned - at the end of this post I will have a video! But what do you need to know about Nubar Reclaim? I recommend stalking on Amazon or your local blogsales. Or, any of them really. It's kind of worth it. It's a 3-free polish, and the formula was second only to polish-godliness. 

Zoya Maya is a cool-toned coral jelly polish. What you see here is three coats. I still have some VNL on my thumb (not pictured because awful bathroom shots are awful and shameful). I only took two pictures because it was 1 AM and I was tired, sandy, and splotchy. But no way was I going to the beach the next day with a bad manicure. It took a bit longer for Maya to dry because I needed thick coats for opacity. I'd like to try it out with undies, but I'd need to find a matching coral. OR I could throw in some glitter. Eheheheh. Ideas. 

Anyway, here is my squishy jelly love. The formula was pretty amazing on it and easy to control - I had no cuticle flooding that wasn't caffeine related. I should also mention that it is grandma-approved. Zoya Maya is available for purchase at Amazon and the Zoya Website. Zoya is 4-free, if that matters to you. 

BONUS: VIDEO OF NUBAR RECLAIM

I'll pepper in pictures I took from my beach trip throughout my next posts: there are kitties and pelicans and my grandma with seagulls! 

DifferentDIMENSION Excelsior!

WARNING: WHAT OCCURS BELOW IS MY ATTEMPT TO CAPTURE STUPID AWESOME HOLOGRAPHIC GLORY ON A CLOUDY DISGUSTING SMOKY AWFUL DAY IN TEXAS. THIS WAS OBVIOUSLY POOR PLANNING ON MY PART. PICTURE ANEURYSM IMMINENT. 

Well. Now that you'e read my warning - here is a tale of a polish from another indie maker that I love and adore. DifferentDIMENSION was one of the first indie brands I ever owned. Possibly my second. I'm not sure. Either way, I was astounded at all the things ever. I eventually came across a sale! Please listen carefully, there is a large cellist playing harmonious music with the angels that graced my internet. I quickly discovered that there was a new polish up, one that I had yet to see... a glorious and fantastic light grey (I'm talking a hair off of a snow white) holographic polish. List of things I love in life: 1. Grey 2. Holos. GOTTA OWN IT. So I did. This fated polish is called Excelsior! And before you ask, while I am easily excitable and am prone to lots of THISS!!!!! the name of this polish actually includes an exclamation point. 

For these pictures I used one coat, killed a gigantic cockroach from the 7th level of evil, screamed a lot, removed all of my polish, and then used three coats of Excelsior! with one coat of Essie Good to Go. Retrospect - should have used Poshe. Ready for the pictures?

This somehow ended up becoming the most awkwardly modeled photo with the best way to show you the rainbows. Please keep in mind this is in NASTY WEATHER underneath an OTT LAMP! Pretty amazing for crappy lighting, yeah? Now - when I put it on and was dismayed that I had minimal rainbows at first (thanks bad apartment lighting and horrific outdoors) I noticed something else - colorshifting bits! WHAT!?! There were some miraculous bits in this polish that appeared to shift from blue/purple to kind of pink. And onwards. Which meant I had to attempt to photograph rainbows and colorshifty bits! IMPOSSIBLE!

Here is another attempt. The shaded part of my index finger shows the shifty bits pretty decently. Other fingers have some rainbows. 

Same deal here.

WHY SO HARD TO TAKE PICTURES OF?!?

Again!

PLEASE SHOW UP.

Reaaaaaaally close now. 

At this point, my camera had been receiving a large portion of verbal abuse because I was attempting to capture this amazing polish. So I did what I could do - took a video!

Thank the heavens. A better depiction! At this point, I'd like to mention that I was so totally thrilled I had a decent video of this polish and it's prettiness (despite my poor backdrop skills). I should now probably mention that the formula on Excelsior! was A+++++. I could have reached opacity in two coats, but I chose to do three for safety's sake. Nice and relatively self-leveling, just minor patchiness on the first coat, but I was using a new base coat and was having some brain derp.

Regardless - the colorshifty bits were being more elusive than I desired - so I matted this bad boy. 

ARHGOEAUFOAHNSGFOITEUON!!!!!! I WILL GET IT EVENTUALLY!!!!!!! But - I will say.... for a matted polish, this is a pretty nice suede-ish grey with pretty colorshifty bits! I wouldn't even mind missing out on rainbows!

Here we go. We can see the subtle colorshiftiness in this one here. Look near the base of the nails - it's pretty prominent!

I'm kind of in love with this polish - matted or shiny! Best of both worlds!

So - what do my lovely people need to know? That when I get frustrated with taking pictures I leave to go to the nearby Baskin Robbins? That they forgot to charge me for a chocolate dipped waffle bowl? WITH SPRINKLES?! Probably not. But - you should know that DifferentDIMENSION has an Etsy and that Excelsior! is in stock as of 10:01 PM CST today. No guarantees. That this is a 3-free polish? (YES IT IS).  That you should ABSOLUTELY run off and like DifferentDIMENSION on Facebook? Instagrammers can follow on Instagram, which is still beyond my skills. And for those who like to shop Llarowe, good news! You can also get it there.

Well - I'm out! I'm being forcibly dragged to the beach tomorrow morning. Yes - I will bring polish. Yes - I'll blog late at night.

SO GUESS WHAT?! I FIGURED OUT I COULD TAKE BETTER VIDEO! SO I DID!

Nail Art (ish): A Jelly/Holo thing with GLITTER!

Some of you may know that last night I went to a drag show to see the amazing Pandora Boxx. AWESOME. Not only was I out far beyond my bedtime, but I had to go off and see about doing my nails in an exceptional way for an exceptional queen. I decided I would borrow a stamping plate from an amazing lady - but lo and behold I was frustrated with my STUPID CURVY NAILS. (yes, janky pinkie, that includes you). But hey - I had a back up! I used Color Club Over the Moon, Zoya Frida, and Lucky 13 Lacquer Bone Daddy. Actually, now that I think about it.... remember amazing polish addict graduate school student who is amazing and I love her? She sent me Over the Moon during a vicious nail polish battle and she sent me Frida in a gigantic package filled with love and awesome. Bone Daddy was also a gift - it was snuck in there during my massive order of credit card melting doom. ONWARD TO PICTURES!

TUR DUR! I used two coats of Over the Moon (although you could probably get it in one), one coat of Frida (mmmm - teal), and one coat of Bone Daddy.

Holy mother of cheese, it gives the holographic effect DEPTH! I probably could have sandwiched the glitters, but I wanted to make sure that they were black and white (not light teal and dark teal). MMPH! GOODNESS!

Here you can see the holographic pretty well. Bone Daddy at one coat does some phenomenal things. Awesome coverage for a glitter top coat, yeah? AND NO BAR GLITTER! AND NO GIGANTOR GLITTERS! (I'm mildly in love with tiny glitter).

Yeah - pretty.

Still pretty. 

So there you have it. Pretty awesome, yeah? And it held up to a night of actin' a fool and being utilized as a toy for the sick sick joy of my dear man-clone that has a fascination with placing me in exceptionally awkward situations or places. Like a bear bar. Or maybe I'm his lady-clone, he was born two weeks before me. MOVING ON NOW. All of these polishes when on in a dream-like wine-induced stupor. Very easily and faster than I imagined. I managed to not smudge anything, which was great. I was tempted to keep using more Bone Daddy because HA HA GLITTER IS AWESOME AND MATTE GLITTER IS THE BEST. But I stopped. Moderation, dear people. Moderation. 

I have no idea where you can find the Color Club Halo Hues in real life. They do have a website. Also - Amazon.com has them. Also - some people keep finding them at Meijers? Good for them.  It has also been brought to my attention (thank you, lovely commenter!) that they are available at Enospring.com!

Zoya Frida can be obtained on Amazon as well. HUZZAH AMAZON! Zoya also has them on their website.

Lucky 13 Lacquer Bone Daddy comes from http://www.lucky13lacquer.com/. She also has a FACEBOOK.

Okay. Time to eat lunch. Not even thinking about re-doing my nails today.